Life's Risks

I know it's been a while since I last blogged, but after reading someone else's I felt inspired to write this one again.

"Happiness is a risk. I you're not a little scared, then you're not doing it right." -Sarah Addison Allen

Over the course of the last few years I've been taking calculated risks to better my situation in life. I've applied for hundreds of jobs and have interviewed for over 50. I've also waded into the world of online dating, trying to "Put myself out there." But the results of both situations has been the same, 'No Bueno.'

Employment:
I've been told I should just quit my job and find a new one. That is simply not an option. I, like most people, need cash flow to survive. I've been told I should take a lower paying entry-level job. But why should I do that when I have the experience and the education required for the jobs I want? I have a plan and it is starting to show signs of progress. Admittedly I am a poor interviewer, but I guarantee that I will be the better employee.

Love life:
For the most part I can pin-point my problems in this area. It's actually a combination of factors. The first being, I'm a puss when it comes to women. I've never been suave or debonair or even witty around the girls I find attractive. Secondly, I've been friend-zoned something fierce. She's cute, she's single, and I like spending time with her, but we're friends. If I could send her one meaningful message it would be that we are friends, but friendship is the foundation for what could be an incredible relationship. When it's all said an done, my wife will be my best friend and I wouldn't want it any other way.

I once thought that I had to be perfect to get the perfect girl. I had to have the good job, lots of money, the highest education, and the good looks to compensate for my weight. Hell, that still may be true I don't know. All I do know is that I'm ready for the next phase of my life, and that phase includes someone in my life.

As much as I want to say to her, "Meet me at the top of the American Towers at Midnight on New Year's Eve" ala Sleepless in Seattle, I know that I just don't have the balls to do it yet.